Writer Wednesday: Six Steps To Sanity Every Author Needs To Know

Every writer goes through ups and downs, but I find that during those down times we are able to further refine our craft and learn about ourselves the most.Thus the reason I have come up with the six steps to sanity when writing is making you crazy, or as I like to put it six steps to sanity when writing makes you want to bang your head against the wall and cry. 

As a part time counselor I can honestly say that I have built my life around “steps” to sanity for my kids at school as well as for myself when I’m writing. In fact I’m a huge fan of lists just because it gives me a reference point, so in honor of counseling and writing I have put together a no fail list on how to stay sane.

Number 6: Laugh at yourself. Some say that laughter is the closest you will ever get to insanity. I am a firm believer that every single human being flirts with a very thin line when it comes to being sane and insane. Have you ever laughed so hard you cried? Or maybe you’re the type of person that laughs by yourself then gets really self conscious because there’s nobody there to watch you? Or how about this, you’re having a rough day, you see the Starbucks sign and immediately feel a little laugh tear come to your eyes because, yes the green sign is on and yes Starbucks is in fact open and what’s that? Oh they know your name! Yes…Laughter, it heals all, and it’s good for the soul. Plus I have it on good authority that it helps you burn more calories. Well laughing and kissing are actually tied, but it’s probably not socially acceptable to go around kissing everyone you see…or maybe it is. Check back with me later.

Number 5: Eat. This one is actually quite simple. The first thing I do when I get emotional is count back to the last time I ate. As a writer its super easy to get so immersed in your story that you actually forget to feed your body. The opposite is also true; to overindulge on Krispy Kreme donuts because you’re story isn’t turning out how you want it to. Food is fuel. If you have no fuel you aren’t going to be writing your best and if you have the wrong fuel you might fall asleep at your computer with jelly donut on your face. And nobody wants to see that. That’s just sad. Eating carbohydrates is the easiest and quickest way to alleviate anxiety and depression as long as you control the urge to finish the entre loaf of bread or box of cookies.

Number 4: Don’t be OCD. This is like asking many authors not to breathe. I get that, trust me I really get that. Many of us obsess over our stories to where we actually end up believing the characters are real. Case in point after watching a few episodes of your favorite TV show you wake up in the middle of the night concerned over the shows main characters and if they will or will not end up together. Don’t laugh you know you’ve done it, we all have. You’re characters are real to you yes, and they are important, but don’t’ get so obsessed with them that you lose touch with reality. If this is something you’re not sure you struggle with then do a little test. If you find yourself in tears over what’s happening in your story more than five times a day, you need to back off, or if you go consume an entire box of ice cream because your main character dumped his girlfriend, yes you are too emotionally involved. Put the ice cream down and walk away. The point is, we all get obsessed, know your limits and know when it’s time to take a breather. Some of the best stories are the ones that are written without being re-read and edited. I know some of my best writing moments have been the times I wasn’t planning on writing anything spectacular.

Number 3: Take a compliment, especially when it’s deserved. It has been ingrained in our brains since childhood to never, ever take compliments. Society tells us that if we take a compliment and say thank you that we are in fact being conceited. Women are the worst at this. Someone compliments us and immediately the first thing we do is either downplay the compliment or give a compliment back to the person who just showered us with praise. I am here to say it’s okay to be great. It’s okay to be awesome. If someone says you’re a good writer, give yourself a high five and let it make your day! Don’t sit there and make excuses about the person giving the compliment, “oh they’re just being nice,” or “they must have read my book after drinking too much wine.” STOP! Let yourself be wonderful! If you are published you are published for a reason. Don’t hide your light just because you feel like you don’t deserve to shine.

Number 2: Write through it. We all get writers block and most of the time when we do get writers block we get really hard on ourselves. It’s normal to get it and its even more normal to get stuck in it because you start stressing yourself out. Think of writing as a running. You have a goal you want to reach as long as you keep running you’ll reach it. The same goes for writing, keep your goal in mind and just keep writing even if it’s one or two sentences, eventually you will go faster and you will reach your goal in time.

Number 1: Surround yourself with positive people. Nothing brings me down more than a negative person. Negative people are like leeches they suck all the life and happiness out of you especially if you are a happy person. Happy people can’t help but give off happy vibes meaning sometimes they attract negative people who need happy people to make them feel better about themselves. When you are writing you are very vulnerable because writing is a very personal thing. Make sure that those who critique your work are not people that are looking for ways to put you down. We become who we surround ourselves with so if you don’t like the company you keep sooner or later you won’t like your own reflection.  Humans are social creatures; we feed off of other people’s energy. One thing I’ve noticed about Astraea press authors is how positive and encouraging they are to one another. Never take that for granted. Hold on to it and let it rub off on you so you can in turn be an encouragement to other people.

And there you have it, my six steps to sanity. Very practical, some very elementary, but useful nonetheless in helping you on your journey to writing!

Amanda turned down Preston's prom invitation in front of her entire high school, but that was eight years ago.

Somehow, her past mistakes always have a way of catching up with her, and making her pay. Amanda's sarcastic wit mixed with Preston's insufferable ego make sparks fly in more than one way.

Preston, against his better judgment can't fight the desire to get under Amanda's skin and mercilessly tease her, but when that teasing becomes flirting, and flirting becomes something dangerously more, neither of them are prepared for the adventure that follows.






Thank you Rachel for sharing those tips for sanity. I think these can apply to other areas as well.  Now check out Rachel Van Dyken's debut novel, Every Girl Does It,  with Astraea Press releasing soon.

Writer Wednesday: Writing Dialogue by Jean Joachim

         Too much of anything is bad listen to how Jean breaks down how to handle the dialogue plight so many writers face.

                     Writing dialogue

Too much narration, that’s my crime.

“Show, don’t tell,” said the editor…all editors! Action, not exposition! I like to write dialogue to show instead of tell. But dialogue can be tricky. Do you write the way we speak or differently? I was writing the way I speak and the dialogue slowed down to a crawl. Help! I found a great article from Writer’s Digest called, “The Seven Tools of Dialogue” and it changed my writing completely, winning me three book contracts.

I use some of the tools directly and made up some of my own, based on the advice of the article and what works for me. The article talks about letting dialogue flow, just write, write it all down as fast as you can. Don’t edit as you go, get it on paper. Afterward, read it aloud or to yourself or both and then begin editing. I write dialogue that way, going with the flow.

Doorstops

I try to eliminate what I call “doorstops” to dialogue, phrases stopping dialogue in its tracks, slowing it down to the point of boredom. My two favorite doorstops are the words “yes” and “no”. I try never to use them. Dialogue without those words speeds up. Here’s an example of a conversation between the hero, Grey, from my latest WIP and the heroine, Carrie:

“So you want my opinion?” She asked, impressed he had read her work.

            “If you don’t mind. Can I pay for it with a nice dinner?” He asked, moving closer.

            “Why not?” She agreed, feeling warmth in her body growing as he neared.

            “How about Le Chien D’Or?” he asked, mentioning a chic French restaurant.

            While “yes” was the implied answer to the questions, the word never actually appeared and the dialogued moved quickly. Here it is with doorstops added:

“So you want my opinion?” She asked, impressed he had read her work.

            “Yes. If you don’t mind. Can I pay for it with a nice dinner?” He asked, moving closer.

            “Yes,” She agreed, feeling warmth in her body growing as he neared.

            “How about Le Chien D’Or?” he asked, mentioning a chic French restaurant.

Another example from the same WIP is this conversation between Grey, and his sister, Jenna:

“Are you still holding tight to your three criteria?”

            “I told you, those were not negotiable.”

            “So have you met anyone who fits any of those yet?”

            “A new woman I met this week meets the first one.”

            “Which one is that?”

            “She’s smart. Very smart.”

            “Good. Maybe she’ll be smart enough to figure out how to win you over.”

            Again, without Grey ever saying “yes” to any of his sister’s questions he gets the agreement across without a doorstop slowing down the dialogue. The point is to keep the conversation moving. Here’s what it would look like with doorstops added.

“Are you still holding tight to your three criteria?”

            “Yes. I told you, those were not negotiable.”

            “So have you met anyone who fits any of those yet?”

            “Yes. A new woman I met this week meets the first one.”

            “Which one is that?”

            “She’s smart. Very smart.”

            “Good. Maybe she’ll be smart enough to figure out how to win you over.”

It may not seem like a big difference but the doorstop brings the conversation to a halt, only to then be started up again. When a character absolutely must indicate “yes” or “no” I may have them nod or shake their head instead of speak. This technique brings in the fourth point in the article, use silence. This doesn’t mean you never use “yes” and “no”, use them judiciously, make them count.

Sidestepping

Sidestepping wordiness by being brief, cutting out extraneous words combined with silence can be an effective way to communicate emotions and actions. It was used by Hemingway, a good enough endorsement for me. Here’s an example of dropping words from “Sunny Days, Moonlit Nights”:

“Want to hear one more from this lovely lady?” he asked.

The thunderous response kept Sunny onstage.

“Song Sung Blue?” he asked.

            “But that’s your song!” she protested.

“Do it with me. It will be our song,” he said.

Confrontation

The article talks about using confrontation in dialogue. I use confrontational dialogue instead of exposition or narrative in “Sunny Days, Moonlit Nights” to show the antagonism, anger and unhappiness in Sunny’s marriage that made her run away:

“It’s about time you called,” he said in a loud, angry voice.

“Brad, calm down.”

“Don’t tell me to calm down! You disappear into the night,

the police think I killed you, the newspapers have already tried and

convicted me…don’t tell me to calm down,” he yelled.

“Brad, if you don’t calm down, I’m hanging up the

phone…then I’m calling the newspapers and telling them you did

try to kill me and that’s why I ran away!” she countered.

“You wouldn’t dare!” he gasped.

“Try me, just try me,” she threatened in an angry tone, her

pulse racing her mouth dry.

Dialogue is an important part, a major part, of every book I write. I love the challenge of writing good dialogue, learning to drop words without losing the meaning, adding confrontation, using silence and keeping “doorstops” at bay. If I keep improving, perhaps I’ll become good enough at dialogue to write a play?

To find out more form Jean Joachim check her out here and come check out Astraea Press's website for new books every week.